The alcoholic octopus
with a drink in each hand
Yes, wrapped in eight tentacles
were beers from eight lands
For sharing he cared little,
so don't you dare ask
And never, ever, get between
that cephalopod and a cask.
He's fallen from the wagon
two or three times
You see, nothing really sticks
when you've got no spine.
Everything's better
after 8 bottles of beer
And when in a stupor
he knows nothing of fear
He's started one or two fights
on an occasion or four
Yet despite all that courage,
ends up on the floor.
Once in a fit of judgment so queer
he made quite a poor decision I fear.
He tied the knot for sure and for certain
by marrying a turtle, then it was curtains!
You see this turtle,
named Myrtle
Turned out
Quite fertile!
Now with a 100 little turtlepuss
mouths to feed,
There are much more pressing
Items of need.
And he's got no money, energy or time
for bottles of whiskey,
Beer,
or Wine.